Keep politics away from your kids

The Home as a Sanctuary in Turbulent Times

I'm seeing so many people consumed by the upcoming USA election. Even American expats here in Mexico are tuning into political media, getting into heated debates on Facebook, in their community, and in their homes.

It's got me thinking about how all of this affects our homes and, more importantly, our kids.

It All Starts at Home

During the 2016 election, when Trump was getting elected, our neighbor's son (about 7 years old) came over to play with my daughters of around the same age. He told my oldest daughter he was worried for our family, especially me, because I'm "black" as he explained to my daughter. He explained that the new president was going to build a wall to keep Mexicans out and, even worse, "turn back slavery" and that I would become a slave because of my black skin.

My daughter, who had never heard herself referred to by color before, laughed and told him she's not black, she's brown, and so is her mother. "So we'll be fine," she said, and went back to playing.

She relayed this story to me laughing as she ate dinner that night. It was funny to her and I laughed along too for two main reasons:

1. It was actually pretty absurd when you really think about it.

2. The last thing I would have wanted was for my daughter to feel fearful for me or her skin color, knowing that would change the world as she sees it and interacts with it.

But I was actually more sad for the little "white" boy who felt compelled to warn her of impending danger that he, I'm sure of it, felt completely afraid and totally powerless to do anything about. So least he could do was give his neighbor and friends the “heads up”.

What's more sad is that this conversation could only happen because of what was already being discussed in that little boy's home.

The Impact of Home Discussions on Children

It reinforced for me how much our kids absorb from us, even when we think they're not listening. Which is why I tried to keep that kind of stuff out of my home and why my daughter wasn't alarmed in the least.

Keeping Kids Out of Politics

There's a reason why people can't vote until they're 18. Our kids are here to figure out who they are first, not to carry the weight of the world's problems. Involving children in adult matters they can't comprehend or do anything about can ruin their greater potential for how they interact with the world right down to their neighbors.

This political game is designed to divide people and get them to feel one way or another about a candidate and their community members. It's a deep trap that tears communities apart more than it builds it up and it’s clear how it rips right through a country.

The Impact of Political Talk on Kids

• It can instill unnecessary fear or guilt

• It may lead to misunderstandings about complex issues

• It can create division among friends and families

Creating Your Own Sanctuary

So, how do we create a sanctuary at home, especially during turbulent times like elections? Here are some ideas:

1. Filter the Information: Be mindful of what media you consume and when.

2. Focus on What You Can Control: Get involved in local community initiatives where you can see tangible results.

3. Create Family Principles: Establish your own "house rules" that reflect your values.

4. Encourage Critical Thinking: When tough topics come up, ask your kids what they think instead of telling them what to believe.

5. Practice Gratitude: Make it a daily habit to share things you're thankful for as a family.

The Trap of "Lesser Evil" Thinking

Earlier this week, I saw a comment on Facebook where a woman was insinuating that anyone who didn't vote or chose a third party was "hurting people". This kind of mentality forces people to choose things that aren't truly for them.

Remember, "it could be worse" is not the way to run your life. Our children are watching not just what we do, but why we do it. If we're teaching them to choose the "best of the worst", we're still asking them to choose the worst.

Vote for Yourself

Instead of getting caught up in the political frenzy, I encourage you to "vote for yourself". Choose yourself. Use this election as a reason to rethink if you're living your best life. You always have the right to pivot.

Historical Perspective: Women and Marketing

It's fascinating to look back at history and see how women, often without realizing it, have been influenced by clever marketing tactics that ultimately affected our homes and families.

Take the 1929 Easter Sunday Parade in New York, for example. The tobacco industry, led by a guy named Edward Bernays, pulled off this incredible stunt. They got women to march while smoking cigarettes, calling them "torches of freedom." 

Can you believe it? They turned smoking into a symbol of women's liberation! And guess what?

It worked.

Women started smoking in droves after that.

Then there's the whole soap opera thing. Ever wonder why they're called that? Well, it's because companies like Procter & Gamble, who make soap and laundry detergent, were the original sponsors.

They knew women were usually in charge of household purchases, so they created these dramatic shows to hook us in and then sell us stuff during the commercial breaks.

The Power of Emotions and Information

It really makes you think.

As women, we've got to be on high alert.

We're emotional creatures, and that's a beautiful thing, but it can also make us vulnerable if we're not careful. These companies and marketers, they know how to push our buttons.

And you know, that's how a lot of misinformation spreads. Like that story about the little boy talking about slavery coming back - I'd wager that probably came from a woman somewhere along the line.

Can you imagine a man saying something like that to his son? It's much more likely it was picked up from some emotional conversation or reaction a woman had. Good intentions or not it got into the mind of a 7 year old boy and he started to spread it to his peers.

As mothers, we've got to be extra vigilant about what we're bringing into our homes and discussing in front of our kids. Our emotions are powerful, and we need to make sure they're working for us and our children, not against us. It's about being aware and making conscious choices about the information and attitudes we allow to influence our family life.

Media Consumption and Its Effects

It's wild to think about how much media we consume these days.

Did you know that families with kids under 8 spend almost 5 hours a day with screen media?

That's a lot of time that could be spent talking, playing, or just being together.

But it's not just about how much time we spend with media, it's about what we're consuming and how it affects us.

Nearly half of adults in the U.S. get their news from social media. Now, I'm not saying that's inherently bad, but it does make you think about what kind of information we're bringing into our homes, doesn't it?

Navigating the Sea of Information

So, how do we navigate this sea of information? Well, it starts with asking ourselves some tough questions:

1. How are our media habits shaping our family dynamics?

2. What makes a source reliable, and how do we figure that out?

3. How can we encourage everyone in the family to think critically?

Let's break this down a bit. When it comes to reliable information, it's not just about listening to experts. Sure, expert opinions can be valuable, but they shouldn't be the end-all-be-all. Use them more like a conversation starter to get your mind going. We've got to be more comfortable using our own common sense and deductive reasoning than someone else's.

Promoting Critical Thinking

Here's what I suggest:

• Question everything - even (especially!) the things that align with what you already believe.

• Look at primary sources when you can. Don't just take someone's word for what a study or report says.

• Be willing to change your mind. It's not a sign of weakness; it's a sign of growth.

• Encourage your kids to come to their own conclusions. Ask them "What do you think about that?" instead of telling them what to think.

Remember, it's okay to have your own way of figuring things out that suits your family's needs, priorities, and values. In fact, it's more than okay - it's essential.

Now, let's talk about promoting critical thinking at home. This isn't just about preparing our kids for the future (though 65% of employers say it's the most important skill they look for). It's about creating a home environment where everyone feels empowered to think for themselves.

Practical Tips for Fostering Critical Thinking

Try these:

• Have regular family discussions about current events. Encourage everyone to share their perspective.

• Play "devil's advocate" - take turns arguing for a position you don't actually agree with. It's a great way to see other viewpoints.

• Create a "question of the week" and explore it together throughout the week.

• When watching movies or TV shows, pause and ask, "What do you think will happen next?" or "Why do you think that character did that?"

The goal here isn't to always be right. It's to create a family culture where it's safe to ask questions, challenge assumptions, and yes, even be wrong sometimes.

Remember, we're not just raising kids - we're raising future adults who will need to navigate an increasingly complex world. By fostering critical thinking at home, we're giving them one of the most valuable tools they'll ever have.

So, what do you think? How do you promote critical thinking in your home? I'd love to hear your ideas!