Pacing Your Power

"The greatest failure isn't in doing too little - it's in exhausting yourself doing too much at once."

I had breakfast with an 82-year-old woman this week who completely flipped my perspective on energy and aging. Here she was, radiating vitality while sharing stories about running her ranch, traveling the world, and embracing new adventures. Meanwhile, I sat there feeling drained from my "busy" life.

The difference? Pacing.

The Trap of More

Ok, so we're heading into a season where everything screams "more":

• More commitments

• More spending

• More socializing

• More obligations

• More pressure

Yet nature's doing the opposite. Trees are shedding leaves. Animals are slowing down. Everything's whispering "less."

The brutal truth? Your "busy" badge isn't proof of ambition - it's often fear wearing a productivity mask.

Why We Really Overdo It

That constant need to pile on more isn't what you think. Sometimes it's just fear in disguise:

• Fear of not being enough

• Fear of missing out

• Fear of stillness

• Fear of facing yourself

Think about it: Are you living fully or just filling time?

During our breakfast, this vibrant woman recommended a movie she watches whenever she needs a reminder about living life versus letting life live through her. "Defending Your Life," a 1991 film starring Meryl Streep and Albert Brooks. No surprise she loves this gem - it's all about a man who dies and finds himself in the afterlife, defending how he lived. Not what he accomplished, but how fully he faced his fears and embraced life.

The film's message is clear: it's not about cramming in experiences or achievements. It's about being present and brave enough to really live them. If you haven't seen it, do yourself a favor and watch it. It's a lighthearted take on a deep truth - we're here to live fully, not frantically.

Signs You're Piling, Not Pacing

Meeting my 82-year-old friend helped me reset my perspective on how I want to end this year and enter the new one. Perfect timing too, as I'm preparing to host a dinner party for 16 people - a three-course meal made entirely from scratch, including holiday drinks and desserts.

Here's what pacing versus piling looks like in real life: I'm taking a thoughtful approach to this dinner party. Instead of rushing the menu planning, I'm spreading prep tasks across days. Making vegan butter ahead of time. Activating nuts - a whole process of soaking, cleaning, and dehydrating them properly for storage. Each step gets its own time to breathe.

If I was piling? I would've kept adding dishes to the menu while saying yes to two other Friendsgiving events this week - one Thursday, another Saturday. But I chose differently. I declined both invitations from knowing exactly how I wanted to feel when Sunday's dinner party arrived. Fresh. Present. Energized.

This experience highlighted some clear signs of when we're piling instead of pacing:

1. The "More is More" Mentality When you're not satisfied with a beautiful three-course menu and feel compelled to add "just one more dish." That's piling. Pacing means being confident in quality over quantity.

2. The Social Stack-Up Cramming three social events into one week isn't ambitious - it's exhausting. Pacing means choosing the events that truly matter and giving them your full presence.

3. The Prep Pressure Rushing through preparation the day before a big event instead of spacing it out. Like my nut activation process - some things simply can't and shouldn't be rushed.

4. The Joy Drain When you're too exhausted from previous commitments to enjoy the events you're most looking forward to. That's why I protected my energy for Sunday's dinner party.

5. The Quality Compromise When you start cutting corners because you've taken on too much. True quality requires time and attention - something you can't give when you're spread too thin.

Here's the reality check: There will always be more invitations, more dishes you could add, more things you could do. The art lies in choosing what deserves your energy and saying no to the rest.

The Winter Wisdom

Nature's sending us a clear message this season. The trees aren't procrastinating their leaf-shedding schedule. Bears aren't pushing back their hibernation for one more social event. Yet here we are, fighting the natural rhythm of slowing down.

This season isn't asking us to hibernate completely (though some days that sounds tempting). Instead, it's inviting us to be intentional. I learned this watching my 82-year-old breakfast companion describe her winter routine. She doesn't stop living - she adjusts her pace to match the season.

Think of it like an artist stepping back from their canvas. Sometimes you need distance to see the whole picture. That's what winter wisdom offers - perspective.

Your time is a non-renewable resource. While my friend radiated vitality at 82, she made it clear this wasn't accidental. It came from decades of treating her energy like precious currency, investing it wisely rather than spending it frivolously.

Here's how I'm applying this winter wisdom to my dinner party prep:

1. Audit Your Yes: Each dish on my menu had to pass a simple test: Does it bring genuine joy to make and share? If not, it didn't make the cut.

2. Schedule Rest: Between prep tasks, I'm deliberately scheduling downtime. No more marathon cooking sessions that leave me exhausted.

3. Quality Over Quantity: Three courses done beautifully beats five courses done hurriedly. Each dish gets its moment of attention.

4. Honor Seasons: Using seasonal ingredients isn't just trendy - it's aligning with nature's rhythm. Winter vegetables are getting their spotlight.

5. Practice Intentional Delays: Some tasks can wait. Not everything needs to happen at once, even in party prep.

The winter season whispers a simple message: slowing down isn't laziness - it's wisdom.

The Real Power Move

True power isn't in how much you can juggle - it's in knowing what deserves your attention right now. This hit me watching my breakfast companion describe her eight decades of adventures. She didn't do everything at once. She lived fully, one experience at a time.

When I shared my overwhelm about upcoming projects, she smiled knowingly. "Your energy today is tomorrow's foundation," she said. "Spend it on what matters." Her vitality wasn't accidental - it was preserved through thousands of small choices to pace rather than race.

Remember: You're not a machine to be operated at maximum capacity. You're a force to be sustained. Like the dinner party I'm hosting - I could've turned it into a week of frantic activity. Instead, I'm treating it as an invitation to create with intention.

Think about it this way: when you're cooking, rushing usually leads to burnt edges and forgotten ingredients. But when you pace yourself? That's when magic happens. That's when you notice the aroma of fresh herbs, the satisfaction of perfectly chopped vegetables, the joy in creating something with care.

The same applies to life. When you give yourself permission to pace:

• Your work gains depth

• Your relationships deepen

• Your creativity flows naturally

• Your energy regenerates instead of depletes

Because here's what my wise new friend reminded me: the goal isn't to reach the finish line exhausted. It's to arrive with enough energy to begin your next adventure.

Want to reach your full potential? Start by giving yourself permission to pace.

Your future self will thank you for the energy you preserve today. Just like I know my dinner party guests will appreciate a host who's present and energized, not drained from a week of overcommitment.

Are you ready to embrace the power of pacing?

Remember, it's not about doing less - it's about doing what matters, fully.